People underestimate intuition. If your gut tells you something is off, don’t ignore it.
Stalkerware is surprisingly easy to plant on someone’s phone, and trackers follow you online and offline.
Tracking software is frightening. It’s designed to report exactly where you are and what you’re doing on your phone.Tap or click for signs tracking software on your phone and what you can do about it.
Before we get to the digital cheating crumbs, my best advice is to have an honest conversation with your partner. Couples therapy is an excellent place to dive into deeper issues. It’s also a good idea to consult with an attorney before you begin looking to make sure you do not violate any federal or state laws.
1. Glued to their devices
Is your spouse or partner always glued to their phone or computer? Maybe work is crazy right now or they’re busy chatting with someone.
Pay attention to the way they behave with their devices. Many people turn their phones away from others to protect their privacy, but most don’t hide their phones from their spouses. The same goes for shuffling browser tabs or switching off a tablet.
These subtle gestures can suggest your partner is doing something they don’t want you to see.
Notifications can give away cheaters, too. You don’t need to be up to no good to take control of your notifications, though.Tap or click for easy ways to end all the dinging and buzzing when you want a little peace.
2. Apps can hide secret calls and texts
In the movies, people aren’t very sneaky. In real life, people go to great lengths to hide their indiscretions. Unless your partner is daring, you will not see a chat app on their home screen or steamy messages in their text message folder.
There are plenty of apps for sharing messages, photos, videos and more that aren’t what they appear.Calculator Pro+ is one example. It looks like a calculator but saves texts and call logs of secret contacts.
Check their screen time report to get a better idea of what apps your spouse uses and how long. Look for anything out of the ordinary. I’d say using a calculator app for four hours a week counts as odd.
Check screen time and usage on an iPhone:
- Go toSettings>Screen Time. ChooseSee All Activity, thenWeek. This will show a summary of weekly use.
- You can tapDayto see a daily use summary.
Check app usage on an Android:
- TapSettings>Digital Wellbeing & Parental Controls>Dashboardto view screen times for each app.
- Screen timeshows what apps have been on-screen and for how long.
3. Look for a second number
An easy way to keep two romantic lives separate is to buy two phones. That way, the cheater doesn’t get confused and text the wrong person by mistake. A second phone is also a liability, even if expressed as a “work” or “emergency” phone.
Another technique is to purchase a separate SIM card. Some phones allow you to have two SIM cards which can be a hassle. A much easier way is to get a Google Voice number that rings on the current phone.
Any new entries for people or companies you are unfamiliar with could be a ruse. Call the number and see who answers. It’s a good idea to block your number.
4. Search every letter of the alphabet
Cheaters would have to be stupid not to clear the search histories on their browsers. If they routinely access dating sites, they will probably think to cover their tracks.
Auto-fill is harder to remember. Search engines like Google do a remarkable job of guessing your search parameters based on everything you have ever searched.
If you share a computer with a suspect spouse, you may intend to type “Megalodon” and instead, the words “Megan Granger home phone number” flash across the field. Take this a few steps further. Start typing each letter of the alphabet and see what pops up.
5. Secret messages and online documents
The most dangerous habit for cheaters is to send photos and videos. These media may spice things up, but they are vivid evidence of an affair. Such materials can be used as evidence in divorce proceedings — especially if a betrayed husband or wife can save or download copies.
It’s easy to secretly embed an image into an audio or picture file. Tools like OurSecret or QuickStego make this point-and-click work for the casual cheater. The snoop usually suspects nothing unusual. The files appear to be ordinary. You need to know a special keystroke or code to unlock the files.
Cheaters are also known to create online Google documents or Microsoft 365 files that look innocent until opened. The filename might be, for example, “Third quarter goals.” When the file is opened, the first page appears to be a bunch of corporate speak.
But scrolling down reveals the file’s real purpose. The online document is a covert way to share notes, photos, and videos with someone else.
6. Check cloud services, including Amazon Prime
Cheaters may also use a particular cloud service to keep images and video covert. For example, the Keepsafe Photo Vault is designed to store these media files and prevent others from accessing them.
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Many customers use Keepsafe for work or personal reasons, but if you notice that your spouse has a Keepsafe account and can’t figure out why, you may be onto something.
Two similar services are Vault and Hide It Pro, which were created to store photos and video and protect them with a PIN. They also function similarly to cloud services like Google Drive, Dropbox, Microsoft OneDrive, and Apple’s iCloud, but security is their top priority.
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Be sure to think outside of the online cloud box. Check Amazon Prime because you get a free photo vault as part of your membership.
7. Check the phone’s locations
As we rely more on GPS, you may also want to peek at your spouse’s location history. For Google users, the “previous destinations” menu option on the navigation system may chronicle your spouse’s movements; for Android users, the Google Timeline feature (found in the Google Maps app or online) functions similarly.
If your spouse uses an iPhone, there is one place to be sure to look. Many people don’t even know this treasure trove of tracking exists.
You can find an iPhone user’s frequent locations inSettings,Privacy& Security,Location Services,System Servicesand thenSignificant Locations. It takes a fair amount of effort to disable or delete these types of settings consistently, so if they are up to no good, you’re likely to find something.
8. Go through the trash
Deleted digital items are typically never gone for good. A computer’s trash or recycle bin retains items until the bin is emptied. Cloud services such as DropBox let you restore items from the trash.
Emails deleted accumulate in the trash until it’s emptied. Voicemails on an iPhone are deleted, but they can be retrieved. Apps deleted from a phone can be restored, too. If you’re using carrier services, voicemails may be available on its site.
It can be all-consuming to find evidence of a cheater. Be sure you take care of yourself in the process.
This gesture is subtle, but it can suggest illicit text conversations. Cheaters are often protective of their phones; they don't share their passwords, and they even change their passwords to keep their phones' content a secret.How to check your partners phone to see if they re cheating? ›
Check the phone's locations
For Google users, the “previous destinations” menu option on the navigation system may chronicle your spouse's movements; for Android users, the Google Timeline feature (found in the Google Maps app or online) functions similarly.
They use Second Space. Where do cheaters hide things inside their phones though? Jayant answers, “One of the most popular ways on how cheaters hide their tracks is by using the Second Space feature which is similar to having a folder entirely away from your main phone's storage.How do you catch a cheating spouse using technology? ›
Most people don't leave a physical trail when buying something, but there is often a virtual one. You can check your partner's messages or emails to see if there are any digital receipts for products and services you've never heard of your partner use or go to, like hotels, restaurants, jewelry stores.What do cheaters use to communicate? ›
Many people who cheat on their partners use secret messaging apps, like Signal, which allow them to chat with others discreetly. Depending on the cheating your partner is engaging in, whether sexual, emotional, or otherwise, there are different apps they might use to cheat or hide their behavior.How do you tell if your partner is hiding something on their phone? ›
Things You Should Know
Your boyfriend might be hiding something if won't let you see his phone. He might change his password or tuck it away when you enter the room. He might also develop weird habits with his phone, like texting late at night and bringing his device into the bathroom with him.
- Comparing Some of the Best Cheating Spy Apps.
- #1) mSpy.
- #2) XNSPY.
- #3) SpyBubble.
- #4) Cocospy.
- #5) uMobix.
- #6) Hoverwatch.
- #7) eyeZy.
- Using a GPS device. ...
- Checking your phone statement. ...
- Checking the back of your closet. ...
- Planting a bug device in your cars. ...
- Creating a comprehensive report with your PI. ...
- Downloading the Netwa app on your phone. ...
- Recovering phone and tablet data. ...
- Hiring a private investigator.
Signs that your partner might be lying about cheating include changes in their behavior, changes in communication, less time spent at home, avoiding you, acting indifferent toward you, changes in your sex life, and increased technology use.What do cheaters say when they get caught? ›
Many cheaters try to blame their partners.
For instance, they might say something like, “Well, if you weren't so distant all the time, I wouldn't have done it.” Or, “I only did it because our sex life has been so dull lately.” They might also try to blame the person they had an affair with.
Create a fake social media account. Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter can be used to send someone a direct message. Create an anonymous account that doesn't use your real name, and keep the profile picture and the bio blank. Then, send the person a message letting them know that their partner is unfaithful.What is a cheating device? ›
Cheating device means a device, software or hardware used or possessed with the intent to obtain an unfair advantage through fraud or deceit during the operation or play of any authorized interactive game.What do cheaters do with their phones? ›
Secret messages and online documents
The most dangerous habit for cheaters is to send photos and videos. These media may spice things up, but they are vivid evidence of an affair. Such materials can be used as evidence in divorce proceedings – especially if a betrayed husband or wife can save or download copies.
Infidelity isn't limited to texting. Cheaters will often use laptops and tablets, and even hidden apps, to communicate with a paramour. A new favorite place for texting is Google Docs. Your partner can claim to be working, rather than sexting with a new lover.Can you check your partners phone? ›
If you're checking your partner's phone or going through their messages without permission, you're crossing a line. All successful relationships come down to setting and respecting each other's boundaries. And this situation is no different. Of course, what you agree on depends on each individual.How do you know if your partner is secretly cheating? ›
- Drastic Changes in Mood. While change is inevitable, drastic changes in mood can foretell trouble in relationships. ...
- Increased Stress. ...
- Changes in Behavior. ...
- Major Changes in Routine. ...
- Secrecy. ...
- Significant Changes in Communication. ...
- Changes in Sexual Desire. ...
- They Lie to You.
So, is it OK to snoop through your partner's phone? The answer is almost never. In some cases, for instance, following a mistrust, there may be an agreement where you are given permission to look through the phone. This could be a way to rebuild trust but is usually temporary.How do I know if my husband has hidden apps on his phone? ›
Find Hidden Apps Through Your Settings
First, tap on your Settings icon and choose Apps from the menu. If things look different on your device, just go for the tab that deals with your phone's apps. From there, you should have access to a See all apps option. Tap it and you'll see all your available apps.